The Modern Age

What I  want to discuss is very general, and I can thank my boyfriend for this entry. Sometimes, he and I will be sitting outside in complete silence under the stars (I know, cliche as all get out) and he'll ask me, "Why is life so complex?" or, "There are seven billion people in the world--why does one person and what that person does matter so much?" And when I answer him, he looks at me as if I was the wisest person he had ever met.

There are three different types of people of this generation: those who party, lose themselves under the influence, don't have a care for school or their future; those who waste hours lost in their own minds, constantly over-thinking, yet oversimplifying everything, love tenderly and wastefully, and are open-minded to the point where it feels like there are no wrongs; and then there are a mix of the two. I have noticed this with every person I meet that they absolutely always fall into one of those categories. Of course, though I am contradicting myself, everyone truly is unique, even in the slightest, minutest way. I am just simplifying things.

 When my boyfriend asks me why life is so complex, all I have to say is that it really isn't all so intricate--if we take out all the worries, all the expectations, all the troubles, we have a very simple form left. This form of life is delicate, but sturdier than steel and can take on a beating never seen before. Life is complex, however, because we make it that way. We let our past haunt us and our future peck at us until there's nothing left but bones. Why do we do this? Is it because of what has been drilled into our heads of what a successful and fulfilling life is? Or is it because it's what we secretly like, despite the heartache and pain?

It is questions like these that help me try to understand why our generation is so different. Most of us have survived enticing indoctrination and have learned to think for ourselves--and I thank the good earth for that everyday. Most of us have beaten peer pressure and if we are condemned for our actions, at least we did them not because we wanted to be cool, but because we sincerely wanted to and knew it would help us or make us feel  better (please do not assume I am essentially speaking of drugs and alcohol). I believe this generation has more of a sense of individuality and independence ever seen since the late 60s. The problem is that we are suffocated and that is why life seems so difficult even at such a young age.

Teenagers tend to make decisions based on their situation. I know several that get drunk because they want a relief from all the schoolwork, and I know several that get drunk because they are unhappy. I look at people who smoke weed (and by the way, I do not look down upon anyone who does these things since three fourths of the population does anyways) as, for lack of a better term, afraid of reality. They need an escape. I look at those who smoke tobacco and I think, "These people recognize death and life's limits and do not fear wholly." Obviously my perspective is probably drastically different from yours and his and hers but it's what I think and it's how I view life from the outside. But what do I see from the inside? What does anyone see from the inside? Do we see hate, lust, gluttony? Or love, kindness, and gratitude? This is why life is so difficult. There are so many things to be put into consideration that we become confused, flustered, and often lost in our ways.

When he asked me why one person matters so much I always say the same thing: That person, no matter who he or she was, had an enormous impact on someone else's life. We all affect each other. I know I have personally had big impacts on people, whether through my kindness, my envy, or my love. To a parent, his or her child is typically what has affected him or her most and vice versa. We are all important. We all have that one person we will remember for the rest of our lives and replay memories of them in our heads for years to come. And all of this ties into the complexity of life.

Now, obviously I'm no philosopher. I'm only seventeen and my outlook on this world will almost inevitably change. I am not wise, I am not experienced, and I am not convinced of myself. All of this just happened to weigh on my mind and I wanted to share. I have no closing advice or tips.

My Funny Valentine

The first of February is tomorrow, and only one thing comes to mind when February is here... Valentine's Day!

I personally love Valentine's Day. It's the perfect day to show your loved ones how much you care and appreciate them. And that's what Valentine's Day is all about. It doesn't matter if you have a date to go out with and have the most cliche Valentine's Day ever. The expensive foods, the romantic movies, the chocolates and flowers--you don't need to receive those in order to have a beautiful Valentine's Day (though let me tell you, buy me flowers and I'll be yours). 

I've only had two valentines and to be completely honest, both nights were terrible. But every year, for as long as I could remember, I'd wake up on Valentine's Day, run straight to the kitchen, and my mother would have set out a stuffed animal and chocolates for each of us at the kitchen table. This year I live with my dad, and when I asked him what he was doing for us on Valentine's Day he said, "Parents don't give their kids stuff on Valentine's Day! That's for couples." But he agreed to continue the tradition for my sake.

But see, Valentine's Day isn't only for couples and it is NOT a Hallmark holiday. To think of it as the latter is really pessimistic and can easily bring other people down. But Valentine's Day is the day to spread love and joy to everyone around you and show your loved ones especially how much you appreciate them. What I personally love to do every year is sing love songs all day long. It annoys everyone else, but it makes me really happy and optimistic. Buying flowers for your friends is always thoughtful and definitely appreciated, but if you don't have the money, picking flowers (even at this time of the year) is just as thoughtful. Watching a cute romantic comedy with the family is always fun, and it's great to end the night with baked goods for them. 

Just remember this year that Valentine's Day really isn't only for couples. It's not about who's there to love you for this one time of the year, but the ones who have loved you for years and who will always be by your side. That's what it's all about, and that is what's most important.

Here's some funny Valentine's Day cards that should hopefully crack a smile.

You've Got a Friend in Me

From what I've experienced lately, finding out that someone you have cared dearly for and appreciated has actually pretended to be your friend is overwhelmingly disheartening. Especially in high school, friendships are a crucial part of life; they're what help you get through your troubles when you have no one to turn to and you just can't go to your family for. But they're not forever, and that's a fact.

On New Years' Eve, I found out that one of my closest friends of three years and also my neighbor only considers us "friends because we're neighbors." When I heard that, I was absolutely shocked. Someone who I had cared for dearly, someone who I had spent time with constantly, someone who I had appreciated and a friendship that I put so much effort into because I adored her; it all meant absolutely nothing to her. Surprisingly, though, I wasn't really upset. I just felt betrayed and embarrassed because she completely fooled me into believing she was a good friend.

Ever since, I've been happier. Weird, right? But I've been happy because it helped me realize who my true friends are and that not everyone deserves my unconditional love, care, and appreciation like I originally thought. Truthfully, it's hard to find someone and be able to have the chance of being friends with them for so long. Let's face it, life isn't all that short, it's long as all get out. 

One person you will always have no matter what--and no, it's not your mother--is yourself. You will always be your own best friend because you know how to make yourself happy when you're down and you know what's best for you, despite what people like to believe. Sometimes, even telling stories to yourself in the mirror is a totally reasonable way to vent out your emotions; you can't embarrass yourself in front of yourself and you can't be weirded out and choose not to hang out with yourself anymore.

I know this sounds crazy, but it's completely true. It's just always good to understand that when you feel like the whole world is against you and you have no one to turn to--you always have yourself. And eventually, those beautiful, ever-lasting friendships will develop and you'll be happier than ever. Just make sure that you're not wasting your precious energy, love, effort, and time to those who don't deserve someone as beautiful and wonderful as you are. 

Cleaning is Happiness

Today was cleaning day in my house. And when I say cleaning day, I mean thoroughly clean one room and save the rest for another day. That's one of the main problems here--none of us want to clean the whole house. It's quite a bit of a workout; you're sweating from all the mopping and wiping down, your hands smell intensely of bleach and soap, and carrying that laundry basket of dirty clothes over a span of a month up and down the stairs will really wear you out. But there are a lot of advantages that come out of this.

First off, your house looks at least presentable. I'm usually embarrassed to have people over because our house never seems to get rid of the smell from last night's dinner and our bathroom has my brother's disgusting towels all over the floor. But when your house is neat and inviting, you really get that homely, cozy-fire kind of feeling, and it's great. Second off, a healthy home means a healthy and happy family. You can't expect to be happy in a room you can barely walk in or smells of feet. And it's hard to spend time with family--sometimes when we're playing board games, I'll see a stain on the table or my hand will touch a few crumbs and I go crazy. My reaction to uncleanliness as simple as that creates a bad reaction from my family, putting all of us in a bad mood. And third off, when I clean, it's such a good way to release all of my negative energy. I remember when I was watching a really sad episode of Glee (The one that was about Finn's death--could not even handle it), I was crying so much I didn't know what else to do but clean. And once I finished I had felt a lot better. I was happier because I was in a healthier environment and all of my negative energy had been released.

So never procrastinate on cleaning. It's better to set a schedule and to assign certain people to certain things. It isn't fun cleaning everyone else's messes all the time, so a chart is perfect. Just make sure you're cleaning because you want to, not because you feel like you have to. Cleaning doesn't exactly sound like running through daisies, but you'd be surprised. I personally enjoy it now that I've actually been doing it because I want to. Always remember that a healthy home makes for a healthy and happy family, one of the most important things there is.